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Thomas M. Quinn & Sons offer monthly Grief Counseling meetings
to the Community. The discussion facilitator is Dr. Kenneth Doka, Ph.D.
and there is no cost to attend. For more information and meeting schedule
dates please contact the funeral chapel.
What is Picking Up The Pieces?
 Picking
Up The Pieces is a community service program consisting of videotapes,
pamphlets and books.free for you to give to the community free of charge.
We are pleased to offer Picking Up The Pieces, an outreach program designed
to help people in our community cope with the complex emotions and feelings
of grief after experiencing or anticipating the death of a loved one.
As professional funeral directors, our years of experience in assisting families
pointed out the need for information and guidance to help people deal with death.
As a result, our company developed the Picking Up The Pieces program... a sensitive
collection of videotapes, pamphlets, and books that are free of charge to anyone
in the community who can benefit from this information.
The videotapes feature personal interviews with individuals who have experienced
a death and who offer encouragement, advice, and insight for dealing with grief.
The accompanying pamphlets and books are written by respected educators and
authors who are recognized experts in the field of bereavement.
Each Picking Up The Pieces program consists of sensitive materials and activities
dealing with a particular topic with which people may find difficult to cope.
Programs include:
All of the videotapes and booklets are available in English and many are
also available in Spanish and French.
Working Through Your Grief
 When
someone you love dies, the grieving process is unique and very personal.
Concerned friends can offer empathy and support, but unless they have
experienced a similar loss, they cannot fully know and understand the
pain and anguish.
“Working Through Your Grief" is a videotape that features support
group members talking about their feelings after the death of a loved one. The
accompanying booklet is written from the perspective of a concerned friend helping
someone come to terms with a painful experience.
Both the videotape and booklet are designed to be viewed or read in one sitting.
They also serve as a resource that individuals can turn to often for encouragement
and support as they heal. Viewers of the videotape will identify with the range
of emotions and feelings displayed by the support group and take great comfort
in the fact that they are not the only ones going through this difficult time.
The underlying message in “Working Through Your Grief" is that
grief is a highly individual process and people must follow their own “internal
wisdom” in learning to live with the death of someone they love.
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A Child's View Of Grief
 Do
you know what to say to your child when a close friend or relative dies?
Are you even sure if your child fully understands the concept of death?
It is often difficult for adults to know what is going through the mind of
a child and what words will comfort and reassure him or her. “A Child’s View
of Grief" allows adults to enter into the child’s world — giving the
adult a new perspective through a booklet and videotape that includes interviews
with children of various ages. The program deals with the important issue of
the adult respecting the child’s grieving process, even though it may be complex
or inarticulate.
For example, a child may respond to the news of a death of a loved one by immediately
going out and playing in the yard. This protective mechanism is often the first
stage of the child’s grieving process. Thus, adults should not react by scolding
the child for failing to show emotion, rather they should watch for signs that
the child is ready to talk about the death.
Adults will also gain insight on how they can assist bereaved teenagers. The
adolescent years are particularly complicated, so death is not the only issue
teenagers have to face. Caregivers are cautioned not to allow the youngster
to “postpone” his grief, which can result in more intense problems later in
life.
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Helping Children Cope With Grief,
A Teacher's Guide
 One
of your best students tragically lost her father in an automobile accident.
Before her father’s death, she got along well with her classmates and
was eager to learn. After the death, she has become angry and hostile
to her fellow students and has shown no interest in doing schoolwork.
How do you respond?
“Helping Children Cope With Grief, A Teacher’s Guide” answers this question
along with many others. This pamphlet serves as a guide for educators who want
to help their students develop healthy, intellectual and emotional responses
to the inevitability of death.
The pamphlet emphasize the teacher’s role as a model of behavior for children
and encourage teachers to talk openly and honestly about their own grief experiences.
By doing so, students realize that even adults must experience and cope with
uncomfortable emotions.
Teachers receive useful guidelines for answering children’s often blunt or
insensitive questions about death. Students may often ask the same question
many times in order to reopen the conversation and to receive a more detailed
response. Sometimes the best approach for a teacher to take is to simply listen.
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Someone You Love Is Dying. How
Do You Cope?
 Coping
with the death of a loved one is difficult for anyone to experience. However,
when someone you are close to is suffering from a terminal illness, the
circumstances are often even more trying.
“Someone You Love Is Dying. How Do You Cope?” deals with the phenomenon
known as anticipatory grief. The videotape and booklet reveal that the pain
is more than the realization that a loved one is about to die. The anguish can
also be caused by the slow deterioration of the loved one’s physical capabilities
as well as the loss of social and everyday activities.
Included in the videotape are interviews with those who have been through this
traumatic experience. They offer practical advice such as knowing when to ask
a friend or relative for a few hours of respite, and how to respond to the changing
needs of the dying person.
These materials provide the framework of knowledge and support you need to
shape your loved one’s remaining time into a lasting memory of love and
comfort. The booklet encourages you to express your feelings to this person
by saying, “Thank you,” I love you,” and “Good-bye.”
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Living With Grief After
Sudden Loss
 "If
I looked at my watch and it said 3 o’clock, I’d have to look out a window
to see if it was daytime or nighttime. I didn’t feel hunger until somewhere
in May of the year after...” Those are the words of a surviving wife,
describing the disorientation and numbness she experienced when her husband
was murdered by the terrorist attack on Pan Am Flight 103 in December
1988.
This story is representative of the personal profiles that form Living With
Grief After Sudden Loss,” a videotape and book that serves as a guide for those
who have lost a loved one through suicide, homicide, accident, heart attack
or stroke.
The videotape is a montage of comments and reactions from survivors of sudden
loss. Their comments are arranged to take the viewer through the wide range
of emotions the survivor had immediately after the loss to the present time.
The survivors recount their stories with information of things that helped them
the most during their period of grief.
The personal stories in the book are accompanied by commentaries by mental
health experts, detailing the complexities of bereavement through unexpected,
sometimes violent loss. The sheer circumstances of the sudden death can produce
additional trauma that the survivor must deal with in addition to the grieving
process.
For additional complimentary copies of any of the Picking
Up The Pieces videotapes or books, please call.
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